Ah, Thom Browne. Tailoring demigod, high priest of proportion, the master of garments that whisper (never shout) “you can’t sit with us.” His Pre-Fall 2025 collection — sorry, “mini couture collection” — is not so much a presentation as it is an exquisitely tailored eye-roll at the notion of wearable fashion. A love letter to the one percent, stitched in wool so rare it probably has diplomatic immunity.
Let’s talk proportions. Ever accidentally worn a blazer two sizes too small? Thom’s done it on purpose — with surgical precision, artisanal gravitas, and a price tag that demands silence. Sleeves end somewhere near the forearm, skirts trail like ecclesiastical vestments, and trousers… well, their journey is interpretive. Because, darling, normal proportions are for people with student loans.
The collection teeters, as always, between costume and conceptual performance. This is not fashion to wear. It is fashion to be seen near. Ideally while doing something utterly pointless — like attending a tea party in a Brutalist museum or staring blankly out the window of a chauffeured car that smells faintly of inherited wealth.
And the colors? Oh yes, the sacred trinity of intellectual minimalism: Grey (“Investment Banker in Existential Crisis”), Beige (“Estate Lawyer’s Second Wife”), and White (“Sterile, Yet Powerful”). No prints, no fun — just the kind of calculated restraint that screams “my therapist wears Loro Piana.”
As usual, Browne’s world is a clever illusion — everything seems classic until it’s not. It’s as if a Victorian dandy wandered into a surrealist dreamscape and emerged with a capsule wardrobe and a disdain for mass production. It’s all very serious, which of course is what makes it hilarious.
Is it wearable? No. That’s the point. This is fashion that wears you, that challenges you to question why you even own sweatpants. It is for those who don’t “shop,” they curate. Who don’t “dress,” they construct a narrative. The ones who call their closet an archive and mean it.
So if you’re planning to “refresh your wardrobe for fall,” kindly look elsewhere. Thom Browne is not here to refresh anything. He’s here to remind us that fashion is not about comfort, trends, or even beauty — it’s about power dressed as peculiarity.
And in that power, there is no compromise — only perfectly pressed wool and the unnerving feeling that your pants are never quite high enough.
Photos courtesy of Thom Browne
No comments:
Post a Comment